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Unlike a bar setting on a Saturday night, where there's often a heavy sexual vibe, these men were talking about their hopes of finding Mr. Right, their interests and careers. There was a nice nurse with a wonderful smile, but he was only Too young for me.

I'm I like older men. They're often more comfortable in their skin. One older guy I talked to who had been out of the dating scene for a while appealed to me. Other than the accountant, he was the only other guy whose name I circled at the end of the night. He kind of shrank on his barstool as he talked but seemed very sincere, like someone I'd like to get to know better.


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There were other guys with nasally voices, a few with thinning hair One had a comb-over. He couldn't have been gay! One guy told me I had a beautiful body, which gave me a lift. I wasn't attracted to him but could relate to his woes about the paucity of available men in the city. So many guys are into partying or games, or are still playing the field, even in their 30s and 40s. One guy noted how San Francisco attracts men with weird fetishes. He can't relate.

No one was completely annoying. There were a lot of kindred spirits in the crowd, men searching for someone loving and kind, honest and attractive. One especially earnest man -- we were moving so fast I can't remember his name -- had fought in the first Gulf War and shared his story of how difficult it is to meet a eligible bachelor in San Francisco. He was one of the most genuine men I sat down with, but there wasn't a physical attraction for me, and I've learned that having the sizzle is as important as connecting emotionally and intellectually.

At the end of the final round, I was ready to leave. The idea of lingering in a bar ever, much less on a work night, had zero appeal to me. My voice was sore from yelling over the din of men's voices. Plus I hadn't had dinner. I went up to the accountant with the eyebrow piercing and said good night and headed off to my favorite salad place on Church Street, then went home.

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Wednesday afternoon, I had an e-mail from HurryDate, with the accountant's e-mail address. He'd picked me, too. He e-mailed me Friday morning, saying he enjoyed talking with me and he'd like to have coffee or dinner sometime soon. I'll definitely be calling him. Caption Close.

Rapid romance / Speed dating attracts a lot of nice gay men looking for Mr. Right

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